Dealing with the Dutch
Dutch people really seem to be interested in what international students think of them. If I received a euro every time someone asked me “What do you think of the Dutch?” I would be worth more than the post-Brexit British economy. But it’s almost the start of a new academic year and international students are going to arrive in Nijmegen, bright-eyed and bushy tailed and all worried about culture shock. So I’m going to give my guide to ‘Dealing with the Dutch’.
I want to point out that me and a Dutch friend have done a “How Dutch Are You?” online quiz, I scored 90% and she score 65% so that scientifically proves that I’m totally qualified to speak on this issue.
First, if you are short, get ready to have a sore neck from looking up all the time. The Dutch really are super tall. Dutch men are officially the tallest in the world. Perhaps this is due to all the bread they eat….
Second, if you really want to integrate with Dutch society, buy yourself a diary and whip it out at every opportunity. It never fails to amuse me that if you are organising a study meeting, dinner or even a beer with a Dutch person they will take out their agenda and pencil in the meeting. Even if it is weeks in advance, that time slot may already be filled. Very practical, but it is as if they are a CEO of a multinational rather that a student whose main commitments are sleep, beer and making it to the occasional class. But I must confess, I have recently bought myself a swanky new agenda from HEMA and it has changed my life (told you I was 90% Dutch).
Third, weed. The Dutch definitely aren’t stoned all the time. Of course, some people partake, but it just really isn’t that much of a big deal. And on a more disappointing note, I am sadly yet to see a Dutch person wearing clogs in day-to-day life. I guess they are not that practical when riding a bike in the rain.
Lastly, the biggy, Dutch directness. Some people kind of struggle with this. Of course, all Dutch people are different but I do think the Dutch have the tendency to be a bit direct. However, coming from a country obsessed with superficial politeness, it is actually pretty refreshing. There’s no bullshitting. If you are finding this hard when you move to the Netherlands, I’d recommend that you try really hard to make a Dutch friend, to get an insider’s perspective. It’s so easy to get caught up in the international or Erasmus bubble but it would be sad to not make a single friend from the country you are living in. A word of warning here, I have heard lots of people complaining about how hard it is to make a Dutch friend but they won’t just appear, you have to work at it. How do you make friends in your own country? At sports clubs, at university, at the pub etc. They don’t just appear out of thin air, take a deep breath, look up (unless you are also super tall), start a conversation and make your new Dutch bestie.
Read Eilidh 's blogs here
Nick wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 13:22
“If I received a euro every time someone asked me “What do you think of the Dutch?” I would be worth more than the post-Brexit British economy”
Amazing, since the British economy is doing very well and will continue to grow way harder than its EU friends. Stick to writing about things you are actually qualified to write about (like the rest of this nonsense) and please drop the innuendo.
How’s that for a little Dutch directness?
nee wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 15:43
Nick darling, that’s not Dutch directness, it’s called being a humourless prick. You’ve just now suggested that what she writes about is all nonsense… Are you sure you meant to visit voxweb instead of geenstijl.nl?
Karel wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 19:53
Yes, Nick, that is exactly why the BoE lowered their interest rates to a historic low.
However, neither side can draw any conclusions so far aside from ‘post hoc ergo propter hoc’-arguments and you may just be reading into this a little bit too much.
Edward O’Neil wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 13:27
Nae borra doll…..no bad at aw….’cept ah struggle wi English awra time….wiz sent this by a mate o’ mine cawd Peter…fink he jist wantit me to have a wee skan o’ it an’ see if it rings oany bells…know wit ah mean, like? Ony wie….gotta go……need to iron ma kilt, chase ma dinner roon the hills a bit (haggis), play a few choons oan the auld pipes and dae a heelan fling or two.
Och aye the noo….an mibbees later an aw.
Cheers ma deers
Jenny wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 13:33
I love your stories, please carry on!
Estel wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 14:31
I love your report 🙂 And it made me think of myself telling the same things to my colleagues in Dundee.
After more than two years around Nijmegen, I can tell that it’s not difficult to make -and keep!- Dutch friends. Just don’t be shy and participate. Class project? With the Dutch! New course at the Sportscentrum? Mix with the Dutch!
And for the adventurers… take a Social Dutch Course at Radboud in’to Languages. Be brave and order your beers in Dutch!
I did eat a tattie scone by the way, Eilidh. I prefer the flour ones with clotted cream and jam… but I do love Ceilidh and I will miss that. And I’ll go to Skye one day. I will.
Marian Janssen wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 14:39
Fun and well written! Keep up the good work.
Wessel wrote on 4 augustus 2016 at 16:57
I indeed always ask this to foreigners, but most of them give a polite and thus quite disappointing answer. Good to finally read the truth, nice article!
Ming Zhu wrote on 15 augustus 2016 at 20:46
I really liked this piece! The last paragraph really hits home. As a Dutch-born Chinese my directness keeps surprising me, especially abroad.
Also, I love your advice for foreigners to reach out and connect with the Dutch and make a friend. I go to ‘Meet and Eat’ sometimes (highly recommended, look it up) – a concept where internationals and international-minded Dutch people mingle – and there I also heard the Erasmus students’ disappointments in their opportunities to mingle and befriend Dutch people.
I guess, in the Netherlands, becoming friends takes more time and investment compared to other countries. Also, the Dutch are direct, but can be very protective or indifferent about opening up about feelings. This, I think, makes ‘being friends’ have another dimension. It’s more about chilling and drinking. Not sure about that last one though, after being Dutch for twenty-two years I find myself still discovering myself and others.